Last November I walked into a gym for a personal trainer consultation. Heavy Metal music was blaring from the speakers, tattoos peppered everyone’s skin, slim and toned bodies filled the space as far as the eyes could see and the F-boy energy was palpable.

My immediate discomfort was felt from the top of my curled hair to the toes of my heeled boots. The animal print cardigan, big earrings, and bold lipstick I had chosen that morning all of a sudden felt like I had donned a reflective vest pulsing out beacons of light that screamed, “Hi, I’m here!” 

I am not sure what force of nature carried me to the check-in desk to meet my trainer, because every muscle in my body was begging me to run. I didn’t belong here. What was I thinking when I thought this would be a good idea? I couldn’t remember.

We walked to the consulting room, passing hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of machines that looked impressive but felt way out of my league and I started to wonder if I had been having an out-of-body experience the day I thought, “hiring a personal trainer is exactly what I need.” 

Eventually, I was seated in the room, able to find my center, and ended up hiring the trainer and signing up for the monthly gym membership. 

Despite feeling like I didn’t belong, I had promised myself that I was going to start focusing more on myself, my growth, and my mental health, and I had to be okay with how that commitment made me feel. 

I mean in reality, the whole point of hiring a trainer was to get uncomfortable, and while I didn’t expect the environment to do the same – I had to be all in, otherwise I was just sabotaging myself. 

I am now in month eight of showing up to the gym twice a week and working with my trainer and while my physical changes aren’t super obvious to anyone else, the physical and mental changes I’ve experienced are HUGE.

You might be wondering if I feel more comfortable in the gym now, and I can honestly say, “a little bit” but I’d be lying if I don’t still stick out like a sore thumb. 

But here’s the thing; the discomfort no longer bothers me and there’s a big lesson in that. 

I’ve realized something in the last eight months about the gym I attend by observing, hearing conversations, and getting to know my trainer and her gym stories. 

90% of the people who walk in those doors are INCREDIBLY INSECURE.

To look at their fit and near-perfect bodies you would think that I’d be the least confident person in the room, but you want to know something interesting? I am probably one of the most confident people there and that is not something I ever expected. 

And that is massively freeing. 

I walk around with my cellulite on display through my leggings, covered up, makeup-less, my mom pooch obvious and protruding, my uneven ribs sticking out, and my wide hips swaying – typically adorned in bright colors that stick out in the sea of black, without much care.

Weekly, I am making an absolute fool of myself because I refuse to take myself too seriously and want something I hate to actually be fun. I’ve had the cable stuck in my hair, almost face-planted several times, and have bashed my face with a weight on the regular. I figure if I haven’t done something ridiculous I probably wasn’t trying hard enough.

I’m at peace with having to use really lower weights on my upper body cause I’m just not that strong and at the same time really proud that I can use a lot of weight on my lower body – even if everyone else is lifting weights that resemble the size of a small car. I’m not there to compare, I’m there to challenge myself at my own pace.

I’ve learned that when I do something completely ridiculous, I don’t feel embarrassed, and I don’t care how many people see or look at me like I’m not one of them in my candy pink top and bright blue leggings. I do not exist to make them comfortable.

And that is the magic of doing things that make you massively uncomfortable. You unlock a side of yourself that you knew existed but you just couldn’t seem to reach.

Adulting is hard and it is so easy to get stagnant, complacent, to only reach for comfort whenever we can. We get spoiled and we just want to feel good all the time.

Our entire society is built around instant gratification, distraction, and avoiding discomfort like the plague. 

Hungry? Get food delivered right to your door.

Cold or Hot? Go adjust that magic switch on your thermostat.

Bored? Grab your phone and scroll.

Too tired to go out? No worries you have thousands of movie and show options at your fingertips.

Hate traffic? Just order your groceries online.

And around and around and around we go.

Trust me, I use all of these things and they are amazing so I’m not dogging them but they have made us a little bit spoiled, don’t you think?

We have stopped doing things that make us uncomfortable because most of us are overwhelmed, burnt out and just trying to survive in the current environment we find ourselves in – so the thought of purposely doing anything uncomfortable is a hard no.

I get it, cause I am much the same way.

I hired a trainer because I wanted to do something for myself, after pouring into my family since I was 18 years old. My goal was to get stronger and create better habits as I get closer and closer to 40 – but what I have been given is something so much more.

I’ve been reminded that doing hard things, choosing to put yourself in uncomfortable situations is truly the key to success, confidence, and massive growth. You will not be the same person because you were before you started because you have proved to yourself that you are stronger than you realize and that mentally you can do so much more than you thought.

The discomfort almost becomes addicting because every day you wake up you start to become more in touch with your power, your priorities, your sense of self. Instead of numbing and distracting your way out of the negative feelings, you embrace them, sit with them, and get through them so you can get to the good stuff. Life becomes less about numbing and more about experiencing.

And the experiencing, the feeling – it all leads to happiness. It shows you the path to the people, the things, and the experiences you desire and the people, the things, and the experiences you no longer want in your life. 

You boldly make changes, you start to protect your peace and your mental health – not because it’s comfortable but because you realize that it isn’t as bad as you thought. Because you’ve proved to yourself you can do it. 

Despite still not belonging, I’m going to keep showing up to that gym so that I never forget what it’s like to force myself into the discomfort. I want to always be unlocking my potential until the day I die. 

So today, I implore you to seek out discomfort in whatever way you can. You can start small but just take the plunge. 

Your life changes the second you decide to get out of your comfort zone. Enjoy the experience and be excited to see the side of you that gets set free because you said yes.